Many men and women ask me “does a ruined orgasm hurt?“, presumably since I strongly advocate this as the best form of punishment for a chaste male who isn’t a submissive (so can’t be caned or whatever) yet won’t stick to the rules you’ve set as being your ‘price’ for playing the male chastity game with him.
And the answer is…
Do NOT hurt.
They are uncomfortable, leave a man feeling somewhat ‘down’ (but it doesn’t last long)… and they ARE incredibly frustrating and profoundly unsatisfying to your man so they do moan, groan and complain a lot when you make them have one.
But there’s no real pain involved and, despite what some men would like to tell you (I can’t imagine why…), they are NOT harmful, dangerous or in any way injurious to his health. And, truth be told men will do practically anything not to be subjected to ruined orgasms because they are so unpleasant (which is one reason they’re such a good punishment for a man in strict chastity).
Now, just in case you don’t know, ruined orgasms are orgasms where you stop stimulating your man’s penis in any way whatsoever just as he starts to come, preferably the instant before the very first pulse.
There is an art to it and it takes a bit of practice to get it perfect but even if you let go after the first pulse you’ll get 80% of the effect. I am in a position now where I can judge exactly where my husband, John, is with regard to orgasm and can accurately stop stimulating him the exact instant before he’s about to come, thus giving him the perfect (from my point of view) ruined orgasms.
Why do I do this?
Oddly enough, it’s not usually as punishment. Because it does have one other use — prostate milking. There is some evidence to suggest it’s healthy to empty the prostate fairly regularly although this evidence isn’t conclusive. Since John is at the moment going through an entire year of orgasm denial, which we are both talking about extending indefinitely so it’s effectively permanent orgasm denial, every month or so I milk his prostate and about every three months, I use a ruined orgasm to do this. If we go down the route of permanent orgasm denial, then they will be the only orgasms he will ever get again, moving forward. This isn’t cruel — it’s what he wants and what we will both, ultimately, agree to if it happens.
It’s not for punishment, as I’ve said — but it is a way of ensuring his prostate is emptied without the need to allow him a pleasurable orgasm, which would defeat the whole object of male chastity and orgasm denial.
There’s a lot of myth and mystery about ruined orgasms and male chastity out there on the net, and if you’re sick and tired of the hype and blatantly untrue rubbish you read on forums then you want safe, sane and sensible advice from a genuine lifestyle couple who live this 24/7.